To face myself.
To face my trauma.
To face my fear.
To embrace my tender vulnerability.
To realise that it was ok to be broken, that it was true strength to seek help, and that truly doing what I needed to do to care for me was the most important action possible, always.
Let’s step back a few months less than three years ago. I’d been brutally dumped by my wife and my spiritual teacher in the same week. Both refused to communicate with me at all. I was shattered, a streaming mess of tears, in indescribable emotional pain.
One night I planned to walk into the ocean, and simply never come back out again. This was how much emotional distress I was experiencing. It seemed unbearable.
Thankfully I pulled out of that vortex. I reached out to family and friends for support. I went to my doctor. I got help to see therapists. I asked for my Dad and my brother to come and visit, to help.
It took 6 months of hard work before I could see that both the spiritual teacher and my ex-wife were covert narcissists, very abusive. I realised that this abuse had triggered a huge amount of trauma from throughout my life.
I also finally saw the narcissistic patterns of abuse in my family of origin. I learned how to see and avoid these unhealthy patterns in other humans, and now enjoy a healthy, nourishing, supportive relationship.
It took years to process the trauma, to heal. I still am working with layers of it today, and I always will be, I suspect. The infinite onion of this fragile human self!
It’s not until now, so much later, that I can see how all the work I did with myself has had immense, IMMENSE benefits for my beautiful dogs and cats. The difference in them is profound, and it’s because they are no longer being impacted by all that stuff that I had suppressed for so long.
Pearl is more settled, less anxious, happier and more confident.
Mitzi is less crazy, more grounded, and much more connected with the other animals.
The cats are more settled, more peaceful.
They are all more affectionate and more loving with me, and with each other.
I am continuing to care and love for myself, every day. I treat myself like my dog. Literally!
Here’s a question.
Do you treat yourself as well as you treat your dog? (or cat, or horse, etc)
Most people pull an interesting face when I ask that question! They realise that they treat their pets WAY better than they treat their lovely selves. (Did you pull that special face?)
The thing is, the better you treat yourself, the better you treat your pets. They benefit SO much when you care for yourself.
Because you are your pet’s greatest positive influence in life and you are a large negative influence on your animals at the same time.
Until you actively work to soothe your stress.
Until you face and gently resolve, heal and integrate your trauma.
Until you become aware of and change your unhealthy patterns of behaviour (these are often subconscious).
You remain one of your pet’s biggest problems, no matter how much you love them.
I’m offering a free webinar on Holistic (Pet) Health Mastery – it’s on at two times, 9am wednesday (tomorrow) and 1:30pm Friday.
In this webinar, you’ll learn three simple, easy to learn everyday practices that will make a huge positive impact on your pet’s life over the next year. You’ll also have the opportunity to join a year-long program to support you in making the changes in yourself that will make 2021 the best year ever for your pets.
I hope to see you there!
Big love to you and your animals, from Dr Edward